I used the smoke in the air for a reason not to go for my daily walk. I examined this reason for believability. Was it an excuse or a reason? I examined it some more. The question was, could I stay home without feeling guilt? After a careful weighing of the evidence, I stayed home and dealt with the guilt. It wasn’t easy, it never is.
So, I have one rule, regardless of anything else, I’m free not to walk on Sunday without feeling guilt. I’ve allowed myself one full day of guiltless excess. Where has this come from. I was raised a Unitarian for God’s sake. Unitarians don’t feel guilt, they reason things out to the last possible nuance.
Today I greeted the sun during my walk. It was sort of smokey, but it was fog. I breathed in deep trying to find a trace of smoke, no luck. I walked on.
You know Steinbeck’s thing in Cannery Row about the “Chinaman” that slipped through the pilings in “the interval between day and night when time stops to examine itself.” That’s always stuck with me, that division between night and day. I sort of stumbled into a metaphor about where we are in our country atm, but I didn’t mean to.
So, my daily route takes me up the slow gentle slope of West Big Lake and down the steeper hill to the boat launch where I always tell myself “I’m rounding the far post.” Then I head back up the hill, I figure this is the money part of the walk, where I’m doing the best at pushin’ all that fat out of the little cracks and crevices in my body and giving my heart a little exercise. Once I hit the crest it’s a gentle slope back down to the house. Once I get to the top of the hill I can once again feel worthy that I have done what I expect I should be doing to stay healthy. The other part is, I feel less guilty sitting on my butt on the computer if I’ve done my walk, sort of like I bought some self forgiveness ahead of time.
Once I got back the lighting on the houses across the lake was amazing, so I took a picture for you.
I like this time of year because of the sharp contrasts, it makes the contrast really pop.
So, in a little less than an hour we’ll have the first presidential debate. I don’t want to watch it, but I have to. Civic responsibility and all that. You’re gonna vote for who you vote for, all I ask is that you give the consequences of your vote careful consideration. There’s a lot riding on it.